wornedout-heart

2010-02-06T07:42:00.001-08:00

Public blogger's journey ends here,
View&Relink me at etchedheart

It's also fine if you don't want to relink :)
Thanks loads.

미우나 고우나

2010-02-05T06:28:00.000-08:00

It was a miracle for you to come back once again ,
And i wont let you go this time.

Back to posting !
Oh god, i'm such a good kid.
I had not been using computer for the past 2 days .
Guai right?
I'm really going to study hard.
Die also cannot drop any subjects i'm holding now .
And by using the term of study hard ,
It meant that i wont be using computer everyday ,
Which also meant that i'll be doing homework & revising everyday!
Can't believe it, i'm so guai . HAHA .
Basically , this few days did alot of things :) .
Wednesday ,
After i reached home from school .
Bath & eat .
Chiong homeworks till 5.45 .
Ate dinner & rushed for tuition .
Ended later than i thought .
So rushed home to do revision for Social studies & math .
After that about 11+ sleep ?
Tired die .
Thursday ..
D&T was the first lesson .
Did my door knock ,
which was partly unsuccessful ?
Due to my roughness & anyhow anyhow.
But the teacher did helped me alot LOL .
He's so funny please!
We talk until so loud.
Shien told me we machiam shouting .
Then even Mr ho look at me i guess :/
Had to do chinese project with bendan, tiffany, jaejin , taeyeon went there too :) .
Need to do A Math test before going off so ,
Tiffany & bendan went home first.
After school bus-ed to Taeyeon's house to wait for her to bath .
As usual , HELLO KITTY !! LOL !!
Then she bath already went to CWP before going to bendan's house.
Taeyeon lied to him that she ain't going .
Then he really thought so LOL.
When we alighted from the bus he seems shocked to see her liddat LOL !
Then uhmm ..
Went to his house to do project awhile ,
I mean play awhile LOL .
Then went down meet squid . LOL .
Then went 768 buy drinks .
drink as we walk , sit down awhile then went up do project again .
Had lunch at his house at about 4+ ? LOL .
Nice right, so ''early'' de lunch :) .
Then before finishing the project,
Tiffany went off first .
After that was me ,
Which was left jaejin , taeyeon & bendan LOL :D
K so didn't went home straight? O: .
Walked with squid home, budden i didn't know got shortcut
So i took the long cut LOL !
Then in the end , he say i so stupid to take long cut HAHA .
Tsk, this is not call stupid kk !
K so when was about to reach cousin's house,
didn't go straight LOL.
Went to one place , did something.
Tsk. This one don't want elaborate .
Secret bodoh . LOL !
K then about 6+ headed to cousin's house.
Went home after that to chiong homework ,
Studied for today's geog test .
But almost all the things i studied didn't manage to use it.
Cause i totally forget everything when i'm in classroom LOL !
K so today as per normal .
After school attended NCDCC .
That CCA is so funnnnnnnnn .
Kind of slack ? But is also fun .
The teacher in charge wasn't as fierce as i thought also .
Ahahahaha ,
Okok , i know i'm getting boring LOL .
Shall end my post here .
Wont be posting much due to the busy school life now a day .
Going to bendan's house to do project again on Monday .
Having math & SS test on tuesday .
Having a re test on wednesday too .
Ugh, so busy. Brain memory not enough dey . HAHA !

It wasn't easy for everything to happen all over again .
If i could catch hold of it,
I swear i won't let it go ever again .
The feeling of being lost is terrible.
I don't wanna experience it ever again .

After love,

2010-02-02T05:22:00.000-08:00

'' When i remained silent,
Not because i didn't know anything .
It's just that i refuse to admit the fact that,
I meant nothing ''

Have been posting almost everyday .
Kind of bored now so must as well post uhs .
Hmmm , todayyyyyy ...
Actually i dont really remember what had been happening these days .
It's either i'm too tired , or i dont wish to remember .
Well ..
As people says ,
Monday blues or whatever .
Yea i admit it's kind of true .
Yesterday was the most horrible day i've ever been .
First lesson was phy , immediately my test result fcuked me upside down.
I passed, but didnt do well .
Kind of disappointed.
But well, nevermind.
Then that teacher , $&$&$^&^%^#$%@# !!
Me and Jaejin chatting about ( iforgotwhatthing ) ,
Then she came infront of us, then say :
'' score so low, still talk ''
I was like, wtf ?
Did i offend you in anyway ?
No right. Ugh.
K that thing i don't say anymore.
Then after Phy ,
She was like : '' can i see those girls who attend green club on friday ? ''
So me , jaejin & one more classmate went out the class.
She gave us a '' tongue lashing ''
Wtf ? We didn't even do anything for god sake.
Then she say another teacher in charge was furious at us ,
For not completing our work before we went down with Luqman .
So i told her that we did complete in the end ,
And the teacher say it was nice.
Then she went to clarify with Luqman next door.
He kind of got scolded by her too . LOL .
She told us to clarify with that teacher during recess at the Phy lab .
K than what happened during tht period i dont really recall .
Hmmmm ..
That's all for yesterday ? LOL .
So today ,
First lesson was SS , dont really quite understand what teacher's saying.
So kind of chatted with Lester & Jaejin , then teacher kind of scolded us? :/
Well, doesn't matter.
Ms Rab gave whole class lollipop after class :) .
So went P.E .
God, it was so damn hot then we've got to run 3 rounds, madness.
So well, ran about 1 round & walked 2 rounds? LOL !
Played Captain ball ( or should i call netball ) ?
K then D&T .
I thought i forgot to bring my textbook,
So i told Mr Ho about that.
He said he'd do something to those who didn't bring,
Kind of scared ?
In the end he never :) . good right.
So recesssssss.
K , then after recess was Chinese.
God, i feel like sleeping in every chinese lesson,
Which i dont understand nor know why .
Kind of hyper too ?
Then teacher gave us project ,
Tmr going bendan's house to do with Jaejin & '' Tiffany ''
HAHA .
So bendan they all was like keep saying not free everyday.
Jaejin went to tell Taeyeon LOL .
Then during CME , Ms Rab changed everyone's place.
Now become girl boy girl boy :( !
Lucky i sit with Irfan :)
Can bully him everyday ^^ .
Then Taeyeon was like , sitting infront of me? :D
Then Jaejin beside me, Dianna too :D .
Kind of lucky this time.
Friends all sitted together with me huh :) .
After that was E math lesson .
Hmmm, did filling for the whole period?
Was delayed from going home .
Went home, eat, bath, do homework . Same routine.
Ugh, life's so boring right.
Tomorrow having chem test, which i didn't really prepare for it.
Brain memory's full so couldn't memorise much.
Or was i too tired to read anything ? LOL .
K then went playing SA . Dinner time .
Before dinner time something happened,
Which i don't want to elaborate more.
Kind of disappointed anyway ? But who would care about me anyway ?
Hahaaa , perhaps i should always be liddat. Smiling even though i ain't happy :) .
K well .. Alot of homework isn't done. And i didn't bother to do it anyway .
Tomorrow rushing for tuition after project-ing with bendan they all .
What a rush schedule i've right .
Hahaaa, no choice.
Life have got to be liddat then i won't think too much.
It's kind of fun anyway :D .

Remembering all those times we had when we were close,
Used to share all secrets we have got.
Now, i don't think it's possible already.
I still hope for the best for you annyway.
Because of a boy, our relationship drifted so fast.
Can i say i regret?
No i can't , we both choose the path we want.
I should let go of our memories, our 2-3years ganship .
I should, i know. I should.

Cause every single word you said,
hurt me .
Sometimes the reason i don't wanna continue quarrelling,
Is because quarrelling would make any memories fade.
The pain, is really ineffable .
Just like how a sharp knife cut through my heart.

吵得好累 , 哭得好累 .

2010-02-01T02:02:00.000-08:00

Life sucks at times,
But we still have to go on.
We often made wrong choices ,
And regret in the end.
But what's to point?

Again & again ,

2010-01-30T06:26:00.000-08:00

You're so beautiful ,
Like an angel to me .

Back to posting again , so bored now .
Slept at 5am & woke up at 10.30am .
So tired please.
Had organ class at 12pm , didnt really practised all songs ,
So had a kinda hard time there .
But luckily teacher's in a good mood today :) .
Went to khatib for tuition after that .
Teacher released us late so went CWP at about 4+ ?
Shop shop shop till about 7 + ,
Had dinner and continue shopping ,
Headed home & bath after that .
Bought all clothes that are supposed to buy ,
Didn't manage to find my shoe :( .
But well, still have loads of shoe at home LOL .
Shall play pangya ltr on :) .
I'm so bored nowadays,
Cause i didn't bother to do the homeworks i had been given .
I shall finish it one shot tomorrow ,
Packing my room tomorrow also :/
Tmr will be a busy day LOL !
Yeahhhhhhhhhh , boredddddddddddd !!
Ending here :)

Please lah , mai ka jiao wei anymore lah hor .
You really making me sick & irritated with ur jiao wei(s) please.
Whatever k, jiao lang gong jiao wei , standard one .

Genie

2010-01-29T05:48:00.000-08:00

When you know the truth ,
It'll all be too late .

HII , I'M BACK TO POSTING AGAIN !!
Basically, this week is like super busy kk.
Have test almost everyday .
Okay , went to Chem lab today to do experiment ^^ .
As you know , i'm super noob at doing experiment ,
So i stir and stir the salt solution , but neh desolve .
stupid right ? LOL .
Then after school went to CCA .
My cca damn cute , Green club ^^ .
Jealous? I know you're . HAHA !!
Kk , dont be so bhb .
Then CCA ends at about 5 ?
Went CWP buy things then bus-ed home.
I'm still so damn sick now,
Sneezing like no tomorrow .
Got super angry this evening .
somehow, super duper disappointed.
Reasons shall not be said .
Well, perhaps i should accept the fact duh :) .
Stop here, byebye ^^ .
Oh ya ,
CAREY IS YAYA (duckduck) KK !!

Happy belated 3rd month Jasmine baby :) .
Thanks for being there with me throughout all this .
Though we did get angry with each other this month ,
It is just a short term one alright.
Same usual thing , i'll always be there for you .

When everything's gone,
Teddy bear is all you got.

风铃

2010-01-26T04:09:00.000-08:00

Because, i'm a girl

HIIIIIII !!
Omg , been long since i posted right?
School have been quite busy so i don't have much time to use computer.
* Pssst . Is i play online games . LOL . *
Okayyyy , the lesson in tuition , which is teacher's teaching.
I totally catch no balls until today kk :) .
When Ms Leow teach the new topic indics , then i understand veh fast. LOL !
Every time tuition teacher will talk until other topic one LOL .
Then everytime extend time. HAHA !
Had been studying with tae , jaejin , bendan every friday .
Or rather, for the past 2 weeks . LOL .
Last week jaejin never come to school for 4 days ,
So i'm like , quite alone huh? LOL !
She had gastric infection so had to stay in the hospital :/
Poor her right.
Friday went studying with tae & bendan .
Before meeting bendan , went to tae's house.
And omg, her bedsheet , pillow , is pink hello kitty HAHAHAHA !!
Then her bolster also pink colour one! Cute right ! HAHA !
And then right !
She bath 5min can already LOL !
She wear her shoe, wtf so cute one can .
Wear so long LOL !
She even kissed her dog before going off . Wow HAHA .
Walked to CWP with her then up to the lift .
Then , when we in the lift got one auntie , i forgot she did what .
Then we 2 there want laugh dw laugh!
Out of lift jitao laugh like mad ! LOL !
Went to foodcourt to meet bendan,
Tae scared him then he jumped up . HAHA !
Ate porridge for lunch & began to do homework & study for test.
Went home at about 4+ ?
Met Jaejin at the bus stop , chatted with her for awhile before i went home .
Math is hell, but kind of like it.
Everyday have math homework, although damn fcuking busy. but still okay.
Annnnnd, i joined green club with Jaejin today , LOL .
Surprise? HAHA .
Cause no CCA to join :/
I'm currently sick now ~
HAHA .
Feel so miserable please.
Ughhh, flu go away :@ !!
Okayy, shall stop here :D

I just cant understand the hearts of men
They tell you they want you and then they leave you
This is the first time, you're special
I believed those words and I was so happy
You should have told me you didn't like me any more
But I couldn't see that and you just rushed me
Although I will curse you I'll still miss you
Since I am a girl, to whom love is everything
I heard that if you give up things too easily
To a man, he will get bored with you
I don't think this is wrong
A girl says that she will never be fooled again
But she will fall in love again
You should have told me you didn't like me any more
But I couldn't see that and you just rushed me
Although I will curse you I'll still miss you
Since I am a girl, to whom love is everything
Hey babe
The pain
It's not enough to describe how i feel
We were so happy together
But I know now
I've been blind
You told me that you'd never let me down
Whenever I needed you you'd always be here
I can forgive but I cant forget
Even though you hurt me
I still love you
I still love you
Don't take advantage of a girl's willingness to do anything for love
And her caring instinct
I didn't know that to be born as a girl and to be loved was so hard
Although i will curse you i'll still miss you
Since i am a girl, to whom love is everything
Although i will curse you i'll still miss you
Since i am a girl, to whom love is everything

If love was like a fairytale,
with a never ending happiness ,
with a prince & a princess ,
with a sweet home & life .

Tears,

2010-01-15T03:34:00.000-08:00

I shouldn't have done so much ,

HELLO . I'M BACK . HAHAHAHAHAH .
Omg , these few days so funny can !!
I remember yesterday ,
After phy class ,
We went back to class .
We wanted to ask Bendan sunny & Tiffany go study today .
Then we were like thinking if we go their class ask for '' Sunny & Tiffany ''
What will be their teacher's reaction ,
Then Shi En acted as that teacher , saying '' who Tiffany & Sunny ? ''
Then me & Taeyeon say '' YO !?!?!?! ''
HAHAHAHHA !!
Then yesterday night keep waiting for bendan's answer about going or not.
That stupid bendan , make me & Taeyeon waited for 1 hour ++
In the end still say i dont know . LOL .
Then today , Nicholas's name become Niki Niki .
Then we were like keep laughing about his name can .
Then we call Niki he go answer '' Yes? '' LOLOL !!
So funny you mei you !!
Then we went chapel , then he say , '' once a nerd , always a nerd ''
Then i answer , '' Once red face , always red face '' HAHAHAH .
Omg so funny .
These few days keep laughing with Taeyeon & Jaejin ,
Laugh until my throat pain sia . HAHA .
Then chem class teacher show us example of vibrating ,
Then she vibrate damn cute can ! We were like laughing . LOL !
Taeyeon , Jaejin & me were like crazy woman , keep laughing in class . HAHA .
This week alot homeworks :( .
Everyday study & do homework till quite late can .
Somemore wednesday got tuition ,
Omg i dont even understand what teacher is teaching lor . So complicated .
Somemore he explain so fast. Totally catch no balls k .
HAHAHHAHA !!
Then got homework , but i lazy do . so must as well dont do . LOL .
My chinese teacher damn cute sia ,
His reaction always so funny one lor . Make me laugh like hell . HAHA .
Today bendan , Tiffany & wenfu never go CWP study with us lor .
We were like so pissed off with them .
Keep there say see first , in the end also run run run .
Stupid ley , say sorry no cute kk , must study with us then got cure .
Can see that Taeyeon really damn pissed off with them too .
Whatever . LOL .
We saw our handphone colour today !! somemore is pink colour.
I handed the $$ to Taeyeon already , she tmr helping me buy also :D Haha .
I bought Minhwan's name handphone stripe also ! Heh , so happy . HAHA .
Shien bought Jaejin's :B
Taeyeon bought the batch for idk whowho , LOL !
Heheeeee , tomorrow got tuition ^^ .
Shall go there '' slack '' again :D .
I shall go finish up my chinese homework now :D

Jeremy kor , today is our 1 year 9th month anniversary .
Here , i wanna tell you that i super love you kay ?
Thank you for always being there when i needed someone .
You never failed to make me laugh ,
Whenever i'm crying , or pissed off .
I hope you'll do the same , but not faking a smile .
You've to be strong & move on alright .
People dont want you me want you kayyy ? :D
You always said things to encourage me ,
To ask me move on , to care for me .
You treated me like a realblood sister .
I want to tell you that you're like my realblood brother .
Always taking care of me .
Thank you for everything you've done for me .
Our gan ship will continue till we both die alright .
I love you to the max ! (L) .

Dont keep running back to the person that hurt you ,
Move on , dont look back .
Cause everything'll be better once it's all over .

꼭은 아니더라도

2010-01-12T05:58:00.000-08:00

Even If It's Not Necessary

Haiiii !!
Just finished doing homeworks .
Omg piles of homework D: !
Basically,
I've been laughing almost all the time during in school .
Due to my new classmates. HAHA .
Omg Taeyeon super funny !
HAHAHAHHA !!
Currently on phone with Regina daughter :) !
Tomorrow going tuition with her :D !
Heh, she is like so damn super tired.
I'm super tired too :( .
I've been doing homeworks for almost 5hours .
Wrote a 500 words essay kk , dont play play . HAHA !
Well , just a short post anyway ,
Nights people. My eye's closing .

I'll try to forget ,
Even if it's hard .
I'm tired of all these nonsense.
Repeating everyday in my mind.
So tired , so tired .
Perhaps letting you go would be better.
For you at least.

2010-01-10T00:17:00.000-08:00

Why am i numb when love was here ,
And missing it when it's gone.

H E L L O !
Okay i'm so bored ,
So i'm here to post .
I finally done my homeworks .
Woot , so many homework :(
Esp the math , 40 over questions .
Must praise me k ? I'm so hardworking now :D
I haven't study for social studies cause i'm so lazy now .
Ew, i've got nothing to do now .
And i'm like rotting at home ?
Went to popular again yesterday evening to get those two books .
Ate at the Mega food mall ? Lol .
I went to CWP like 2 days ? LOL .
Friday i went with Taeyeon , Jaejin & Jeanne.
Was like raining when i walked home .
I downloaded FT Island's Double date song 2 times k .
One time i double all together but they say cannot play in fone -.- .
Then i went to download again but there's still 2 songs that cant be played.
Damn fed up can .
Omg omg this week school is like so busy O.O ?
My tuition is starting on next wednesday :( !
So bored now ,
I cut-ted down on audi since monday .
So guai ^^ .
Yesterday night chatted with Taeyeon & Bendan .
Omg we were like bullying him .
Then Taeyeon cant stop laughing .
Make me laughing like no tomorrow also LOL .
Nothing more already ^^
Shall post again when i've the time .
Laughs , byebye !

I tried not to think of you ,
But even as i try ,
I still cant forget about you .
Is this why i cant let go & choose to wait ?
My faith is going down day by day .
Will i have the faith to wait till the day you return ?
I'm on the verge of giving up & breaking down already .
Should i , just let go & move on ?
Perhaps i'm the one who's still struggling .

壞人

那一扇車門　關出我們的裂痕
一聲就震斷了回頭的路程
愛無法均分　以後就留給你們
也許用傷害結束　愛才更動人
容忍的人其實並不笨　只是寧可對自己殘忍
既然愛不能恆溫　祝福就給你下一個人
你是好人　也是個壞人
對我坦誠　只為了朝他狂奔
不能放任　所以放了
這點痛我還能忍
我是好人　也是個壞人
分得夠狠　你才有藉口轉身
寧願愛　一點不剩
也不忍　看戀人愛成路人
容忍的人其實並不笨　只是寧可對自己殘忍
既然愛不能恆溫　祝福就給你下一個人
你是好人　也是個壞人
對我坦誠　只為了朝他狂奔
不能放任　所以放了
這點痛我還能忍
我是好人　也是個壞人
分得夠狠　你才有藉口轉身
寧願愛　一點不剩
也不忍　看戀人愛成路人
三個人從不對等　總有個人必須犧牲
那永恆　就等他帶你完成
你是好人　也是個壞人
對我坦誠　只為了朝他狂奔
不能放任　所以放了
這點痛我還能忍
我是好人　也是個壞人
分得夠狠　你才有藉口轉身
寧願愛　一點不剩
也不忍　看戀人愛成路人
寧願愛　一點不剩
也不忍　看戀人愛成路人

2010-01-08T02:57:00.000-08:00

Abracadabra

Hiiiiiiiiiii !
See the video on top ,
Omg this guy is super handsome & cute right !!
Heard that he's a singaporean :/ !
He sing until so cute manzxc .

Okayyy, shall start with school .
Omg all my subject teachers talk until machiam stress me out .
Like going to drop all subjects liddat .
I've been so hardworking for this week HAHA .
New class now still okayokay ,
But i still miss 2E2 alot , LOL .
Yesterday during english lesson ,
Heard Mak's laughter . Wtf so loud can .
Then the whole 2E2'o9 group laugh LOL .
Then teacher looked at us :/ .
Heh , had A math test today , guess i passed ? LOL .
I still have 2 homeworks yet to be finished .
Shall finish tomorrow . Today so tired .
Had been sleeping super duper early this week ,
But still cant wake up on time .
Yawns , even now i feel like sleeping :/ .
Well , spent alot of money on books .
Shall end now, byebye .

你还爱我吗

2010-01-04T04:06:00.000-08:00

True love,

Hi , first day of school today .
As well as GuanRui brother birthday ^^ ,
Went to Serangoon just now to celebrate.
But dont have birthday cake ley. So wierd.
Di & Mei birthdays got cake only his birthday dont have O.O !
School is usual , only i'm not used to the class being so quiet .
Last year go in the class jiu machiam crazy already . Noisy die .
Suddenly now become so quiet LOL .
Okayyyy . I've got nothing more to post about .
Shall post about it next time .

林宥嘉 - 說謊

是有過幾個不錯對象說起來並不寂寞孤單
可能我浪蕩讓人家不安才會結果都陣亡

我沒有什麼陰影魔障妳千萬不要放在心上
我又不脆弱何況那算什麼傷
反正愛情不就都這樣

我沒有說謊我何必說謊
妳懂我的我對妳從來就不會假裝
我哪有說謊
請別以為妳有多難忘笑是真的不是我逞強

我好久沒來這間餐廳沒想到已經換了裝潢
角落那窗口聞得到玫瑰花香
被妳一說是有些印象

我沒有說謊我何必說謊
妳知道的我缺點之一就是很健忘
我哪有說謊
是很感謝今晚的相伴但我竟然有些不習慣

我沒有說謊我何必說謊
愛一個人沒愛到難道就會怎麼樣
別說我說謊
人生已經如此的艱難有些事情就不要拆穿

我沒有說謊是愛情說謊
它帶妳來騙我說渴望的有可能有希望
我沒有說謊祝妳做個幸福的新娘
我的心事請妳就遺忘

不能说的秘密

2010-01-01T07:11:00.000-08:00

最美的不是下雨天,是曾与你躲过雨的屋檐

Hiiiiii !
HAPPY NEW YEAR , 2010 (: .
Ogey , done saying new year lerhs .
New year , new start .
Hope that i wont be that stress anymore uhs .
Anyway , school's reopening soon .
Sec 3 already , omg so fast .
Must work hard already :D .
Anyway , didnt manage to have wedding today .
Ugh , quite disappointed , cause today's 010110 . Wtf can .
So nice lor the number.
Nbms , anyway tmr me and Melinda dearestluv getting married . HAHA !
Too bad , me and her going to chiong ring :D .
Luv dai her can , she never fail to make me laugh like no tmr when i was about to cry .
Hope i can make her happy too HAHA .
Anyway , quarrelled with mother yesterday about stupid things can .
She's so unreasonable .
Shall post what happened yesterday in my private blog HAHA .
Hmmmm , i'm so bored now .
Bored bored bored , yet dont feel like plurking .
I lost 2 person this week, ughs .
D: ,
Drink beer until now whole body hot hot . Wtf . LOL .
Tmr going to Malaysia with cousins at about 9+ am in the morning .
Niceeeeeeeeee . Hohohoho !
Shall end here , post next time (:
Probably when school reopens .

Never be replaced - First lady .
Baby I love you and I'll never let you go
But if I have to boy I think that you should know
All the love we made can never be erased
And I promise you that you will never be replaced
Baby I love you and I'll never let you go
But if I have to boy I think that you should know
All the love we made can never be erased
And I promise you that you will never be replaced
I love you, yes I do yes i do)
I'll be with you as long as you want me to
Until (until) the end (the end) of time (of time)
From the day I met you I knew we'd be together
And now I know I wanna be with you forever
I wanna marry you, and I wanna have your kids
It can never compare to the feeling of your kisses
I can say I'm truly happy to this day
You make me thank God that I live my life everyday
There's never been a doubt, in my mind
That I regret ever having you by my side
But if the day comes that I have to let you go
I think there's something I should probably let you know
Enjoyed everyday, that I spend with you
And I wont miss you cause I'm happy that I had you at all
Baby I love you and I'll never let you go
But if I have to boy I think that you should know
All the love we made can never be erased
And I promise you that you will never be replaced
Baby I love you and I'll never let you go
But if I have to boy I think that you should know
All the love we made can never be erased
And I promise you that you will never be replaced
I love you, yes I do
I'll be with you as long as you want me to
Until the end of time
Over...

我沒有說謊是愛情說謊 ,
它帶妳來騙我說渴望的有可能有希望 .

Kiss the baby sky,

2009-12-28T07:23:00.000-08:00

I'll press delete ,
When i'm ready .
Do give me time,
Cause i'm feeling breathless now.

Hai , i'm back to posting.
Will be MIA-ing perhaps ,
When school reopens .
For now, i just want to spend the rest of the holiday.
S M I L I N G .
Jasmine baby, dont worry about me .
I'm mature enough to handle everything .
Trust me .
I'll do what i promise to you, (: .
Thanks for everyone who is concern about me yeah .
Will be rotting at home almost everyday ,
But wednesday will be visiting Joel & family again .
Bought Shien's present today at Lot 1 ,
Will be handing it to her when school reopens :) .
Today's Jingyao's birthday .
Didnt went to the outing today . so sorry .
Be more mature since you're 17 already alright .
Happy birthday to you (: .
Alvin.L , thanks for training my maple ! :D .
Currently chatting with Grace laopo ,
I love her okay. She's here for me to rant my sadness .
Know her already going 2 years le .
Thanks for being there always , laopo .
For my private things,
I shall post it in my private blog yeah .
Will be stopping here .
Ain't posting often anymore.
:) .
-

Cause everything ended , and i wish to run away .

Love is fading,

2009-12-24T08:32:00.000-08:00

Firstly ,
Merry Christmas to everyone (: .
Hope everyone will forget the unhappiness ,
And the bad things that happened to all of us this year .
And may God, continue to bless us . (L)

Alright,
Went to watch Avatar with mummy today .
Omg that show is damn fcuking nice canzxc.
I wanna watch it again & again .
I told mummy to buy me that CD once it's released .
She said okay , amazing .

Shien's birthday was yesterday .
Didn't manage to post about her ): .
Po , we know each other for 1 & a half year already uhs .
Although we're from the same primary school ,
We didn't talk much then .
Laughs , don't know why also .
Just wanna wish you a happy belated birthday ,
And may all your wishes come true alrights.
I'll pass you your present when school reopens (: .
LotsOfLove (L) .

Today , or should i say 23 ; yesterday .
Was Me & Jasmine baby's 2nd month Anni ^^v .
So happy yeah .
But i still did not have the time to do that photos ): .
I'll do it asap alright .
Baby, although we've only know each other for 2 months ,
You understand me very well .
I know something happened just now ,
And i know you're damn worried about him ,
And perhaps crying now .
I'm so sorry i really cant do anything .
If i can go out now ,
I promise i'll help you to find him and go your house let you see he's safe .
But i cant ): .
You're busy glitching & i'm busy thinking how to settle other problems too .
But your problems will always be the priority alrights ?
So clean your tears ,
Or you want my toilet paper , shirts & washing machine?
Me can give you FOC one (: .
My phone is 24/7 for you ( perhaps sometimes not that long uh :x ) .
And you can call or msg me anytime if you've anything troubling you alright ?
I'll always be there for you derhs .
I know you're at lost of what to do ,
But he didn't bring his phone you cant do anything ,
So please, dont cry already .
You ain't at fault,
And you definately ain't a bad girlf .
You're such a nice girl,
I believe he wasn't angry just because of that thing alright ?
He just needs to take a break, clear his mind, think about everything .
I'm sure he'll be back soon, he wont leave you one.
That's the promise he made to me,
Taking care & protecting you .
So,
Cannot cry on Christmas ): .
Must smilesmile one okay ?
Happy 2nd month once again (L) .
Me luv you to the max .

Melinda daughter is finally coming back soon ^^ .
She say me & her going to chiong heart .
Hahahahahahahaha!
Didnt manage to wish her a Merry Christmas cause she's offline now .
Shall wish her in the morning yeah .
Hohohoho .

XuanLong kor haven come back from Taiwan also .
Zxc, miss die him canzxc.
Faster come back lah you this kukubird,
I haven say merry christmas to you ley D: !

Jeremy kor!
This part is specially for you kayyy.
Merry Christmas ,
I hope that you won't be so emo anymore alright .
You swear you wont abandon us anymore ,
So you cannot leave already .
Everyone needs you, even the clique .
Why bother about a person who dont even care about you ?
Take my advise, let him go , be happy.
Forget about your past.
I know it's damn hard to forget.
But you've got to move on,
Everyone moves on, and i'm sure you've to .
I need you to be as happy as before.
But not faking a smile,
Please, we're gans for 1year plus already ,
You happy or not i know one .
I dont want you to fake a smile or pretend,
Just to make others happy.
Dont always treasure the people who ignores you .
You liddat i very worried you know.
I believe not only me is worried,
Alicia jie , Jiaqi , Shihui , Adam , Meiqi all this also will de.
So please, cheer up & move on okay?
Anything can come tell me derhs .
Me luv you to the max (:

Sometimes, i'm really quite disappointed with you.
I dont know what to say,
I just know that i dont have the strength to bother abt it anymore ..
I need my strength to think about my gan's problem ..

where did you go,

2009-12-22T05:41:00.001-08:00

This mv is super cute k .
Melinda daughter intro me de. LOL !
See liao comfirm laugh ogey!

Anyway, today went to junrong brother's birthday bbq .
Omg nothing to do at there manzxc.
Just eat a little bit, then zao home already .
He say wont play basketball de lor!
In the end also playing basketball !!
Kukubird hor D: , i'm so bored now.
I've got nothing to do in facebook,
Nor plurk. LOL .
Currently chatting with Melinda now,
She's super funny can .
Chat with her can laugh machaim no tomorrow.
Super boring these days,
School is reopening soon ,
Omg omg omg , so fast !
I haven even enjoy my holidayyyyyyyyyyyyy .
Shall end here, will post in private blog :B

Supergirl

2009-12-20T06:17:00.000-08:00

Old but colourful ,
Just like elderly .

Quite lazy to post now a days :x ,
So shall post once in a while .
Hmmmmm ,
Went to celebrate Gy's birthday at Serangoon on friday (: .
Had a family gathering , ate & cut cake .
Chatted awhile with cousins regarding their China trip .
Went down to Junction 8 with them after that .
Reached home at about 9+ pm going 10 .
Used computer till about 1am + .
So tired.
Went to visit Ms Kom & family yesterday (: .
Omg i saw her 6 days old baby girl,
She is like so damn fcuking cute canzxc.
I think she was pregnent with twins ,
But dropped one , such a pity. sighs .
Anyway, so that cute 3yearold boy Joel !
Omg he've grown so much manzxc.
And he looks exactly like Winnie the pooh now -.- !
Cause Ms Kom likes Winnie the pooh alot . LOL .
That baby girl is call Joey (: .
Oh, it makes me remember of someone ..
But well , shall not elaborate much :D !
They're so damn cute canzxc.
I wanna visit them again! LOL !
Pictures will be posted in my p.blog (: .
So boring at home these days ,
And school is reopening soon .
Shall work hard & study already!
Heh, shall go to maple nao .
Byebye :D

Negative things,

2009-12-16T19:42:00.000-08:00

I wish to go to the beach alone ,
To see the sunset alone ,
To listen to the sea breeze alone .
Alone & alone ,
This is what i'll be, in the end .

booooooooooooooooooooooooozx!
Yesterday didn't post cause lazy :X !
Shall post today .
Omg cousins are back in Singapore!
So happy , ( you could say i was mad ) .
Well , all are sick . LOL .
So i somehow got infected too .
Didn't bother to know if i'm having fever or not .
Played maple for almost the whole day .
So boredddddd .
Omg , tonight Jeremy's come back to Singapore already ^^v .
9 more days before Melinda come back to Singapore .
Then i can couple her in audi using my boy acc . LOL.
Didn't chat much with her yesterday D: !
Boreddaime manzxc .
Shall stop posting for now .
Ltr then i upload one video ^^v .
Melinda introduced me one :D

Sometimes i really dont know whatthehell you're thinking .
And whythefcuk you don't want to tell me what you're thinking .
I really feel so lost now , what should i do ?

Burning out

2009-12-15T05:38:00.000-08:00

I dreamt of the perfect one,
To watch the sunset with me,
To walk with me on the beach ,
Who holds my hand till the end .

Hi hi hi hi ,
Been so long since i posted.
Kind of lazy to post recently.
Alot things happened again .
And i've got no mood now to elaborate .
Only those who're close to me know what happened .
Watched New Moon with XuanLong kor today :] .
Jasmine baby cant make it ): ,
And no one is free ,
So i vented my anger on him .
And then he really say come pei me watch .
So bought presents & earing ,
Watched movie & went home .
Bought 10k cash too .
Now currently chatting with Melinda daughter in msn .
Kind of tired , and i mean tired in everything .
Melinda daughter is trying damn hard to make me smile .
Yeah, i did smile . Thanks to her .
Luv her tons ogey , dont playplay. LOL.
Well , i didnt blame Jasmine baby for not turning up for our outing yeah .
All her father's fault? Laughs :]
Okay , i still wanna thanks XuanLong kor for accompanying me to watch movie .
And i kind of scared him with my scream during the movie :x !
He's going Taiwan this saturday i think ,
Till next sunday . Will miss him , laughs .
I'm currently also playing famville in facebook .
Bored die me,
shall go to plurk ltr .
Dont have time to watch show ): !
Considering mia audi & watch show?
LOL .
Melinda daughter gave me alot of videos to upload LOL .
I shall upload one by one everytime i post. HAHAHAHA .
Lazy to post x.x ..
Shall end here (: .

1 week since Melinda daughter went Taiwan ,
11 days before she's back ): .

4 days since Jeremy went Shanghai ,
3 more days before he's back D: !

3 days since Alvin.Lee went Malaysia ,
4 more days before he's back ): !

wedding dress

2009-12-13T08:28:00.000-08:00

Minhwannniie (L) !

Okayy , i just finished changing blogskin :D .
Me & Jasmine baby changed the same skin :P !
Now our url is almost same, our skin is the same!
We're totally twins :P !
Haha , me luv her tons manzxc!
Looking forward to meet her on tuesday :D !
Okayy , basically i done nothing today -.- .
I watched tv from morning till evening ,
Then went to packet food come home .
Eat , bath , use com till now .
Mummy's nagging me to off it now .
And i shall off after i post (: !
Laughs , tmr mummy no work again .
So i wont use com early . Haha .
Ms Kom's baby girl is finally borned jus now at 8++ pm !
So happy for her ^^v .
Omg aiai is sick ): .
Wish i could fly to his house to takecare of him now .
Dumb him, dont know how takecare himself!
Grrrrrrrr .

6 days since Melinda left Singapore ,
12 days counting down till she returns .

Gahhhhzx , others i dont remember already . LOL .
Anyway, shall stop here .
byebye :D

Goodbye

2009-12-10T20:31:00.000-08:00

What if i die tomorrow,

Back to post.
I went back maple o.o ..
Lololzxc.
should i quit audi?
Dont feel like playing so much ,
So many things,
Shall post in private blog ltr.

3rd day without Melinda daughter ): .
14 days before she return to Singapore ): .
Mel, faster come back .
I'm breaking down without you already ): .
Come cheer me up ): ..

1st day without Jeremy goodfriend.
6 days before he return ): .
Super miss him.
Without him who will i turn to ): .

Tomorrow will be the first day without Alvin Lee.
8 days ltr then he'll be back.
Sigh.

XuanLong kor also going taiwan ): .
Omg why so many people leaving me !!
Gahhhhhhhhhhhzx.

Let me hear your voice

2009-12-09T01:51:00.001-08:00

Very good word ,

Hiiii , yesterday didnt post so came here to post today :D
Ugh, Melinda daughter had gone to Taiwan ,
And today is the first day i'm living without msging her.
Miss her so much so much ): !
She go already no one comfort me ):
And no one hyper with me ):
No one listen to my nags also .
Omg Melinda daugter you faster come back Singapore lah!!!!!
Still need to wait to 26 dec, Omg i'd have died by then ): !
Anyway,
Finally finished watching You're beautiful !
I watched the last episode 2 times , too nice already .
The way he confess to her is so nice ^^v .
Haha ,
I went back playing maplesea O.O !
LOL , i recreated a character today & currently level 13 ._.
I'm so god damn lazy to train until 2nd job already .
Might be mia-ing audi cause nothing to do in audition .
Looking forward to nxt tuesday going out with Jasmine baby ^^v .
I'm going to watch New Moon , HAHAHAHHAHAHA !
Okay i'm quite happy today cause i didnt quarrel with him (:
Happy happy happy, everyday liddat jiu good le .
But comfirm cant de lor .
Anyway , Shall stop here .
Watch the video on top!
Jeremy ( Hongki ) sing tht song .
Damn niceee bodoh !

Promises

2009-12-06T23:59:00.000-08:00

A Blind Love .

H E L L O ! LOL .
Back to post again ^^v .
Too boring at home , no choice. Laughs .
Okayyyy.
Woke up at about 10.30 am this morning .
Started to watch You're beautiful till 3pm+ then went to back .
Now back to watching that show again .
Have not been touching audi for 1 day , so guai right :B .
Heh, nothing to post now a days .
Cousins took 8am's flight this morning.
Wasn't able to send them off .
Cause i'm still sleeping like a pig :/
Hmmmm,
Tmr Melinda daughter flying off to Taiwan D:
Only will return on 26 dec .
Omg miss die her manzxc.
She go le no people everyday talk to me through msg already ): .
Comfirm boring dai .
Will miss her bhb-ness also ): .
Jeremy kor says he's going to be sick soon .
Then he tell me no $$ go see doctor .
Should i end here? LOL .
Yes, i should .
Oh crap, i'm entertaining myself -.- .
Alright. End here.
Shall post tmr ! :B

2009-12-06T01:05:00.000-08:00

Cause every coupls started with friends,

Haiiiiizx , this video is damn nice so i decided to post it again .
That time i see until i cry o.o ..
Okay , time to post again .
Firstly :
Shermine superwoman,
Happy 16th birthday to you !
Hope you'll cheer up alrights ?
Anything , i'm here .
So dont worry much .
Meluvyouzx , enjoy your birthday .
Though we quarrelled alot of times,
Usually for stupid reasons ,
But still iluvyou.
So cheer up ya ?
Happy birthday to you ,
Happy birthday to you ,
Happy birthday to superwoman ,
Happy birthday to you ^^v

Okay ...
I've got no mooooodddddddd now ,
And i feel like punching someone ):< !
Just finished feeding my facebook games .
Oh yea, cousins going China today ): .
Gonna miss them for one whole weeks .
Though we often quarrelled last time ,
But i still love them alot ): .
Hope they do takecare of themselves ,
Faster come back spend Christmas with me meimei ):
Me will miss you alot too kor&di ): .

Chatting with Sheryl mummy in msn now (:
I love her LOL .
She's so good (: .
Shall end here , wil post in private blog soon (: .

2009-12-05T05:28:00.000-08:00

Boooom! I jumped right down .

HI HI HI HI HI !

Bored dai me .

LOL .

Manage not to touch audi for almost whole day (:

Guess my addiction is slowly going off.

Well , Junrong brother's birthday is coming & going to have a bbq near his house :D

Gonna pull Regina go with me :D !

I finally finish watching half of You're beautiful .

Omg i wanna go to th FT Island fansign & handshake !!!!!!!

But i dont even have half of what is needed to buy th ticket ): .

Have been playing facebook's games LOL .

Shall consider going back maple ^^v .

Holiday is getting bored .

Went organ class today ,

Glad to know that Ms Kom's baby is girl ; she wanted it to be a girl .

Is that baby's gonna be due at around 19 dec .

If delay should be near Christmas eve . So cool . Lol .

I die also want to visit her , her baby & You Wei when she having confine-ment :D .

Alot people going Taiwan this holiday ,

Including Melinda daughter & XuanLong kor ): .

I am gonna miss them both HAHA .

Shall end here :x

Cause i need you,

2009-12-03T21:46:00.000-08:00

Being by your side, till you reached the highest point

Hi , i'm back to post again .

I'm basically posting everyday , cause i've got nothing to do.

Watching You're beautiful now again , currently stuck at ep 7 .

I watched 1 ep today ^^v .

LOL ,

Chatted with alot of people this morning in msn .

Audi awhile .

Now afk-ing in audi while watching .

Mummy's not back with food & i'm so god damn hungry now .

I wish she could fly back home now ): .

Jasmine baby had gone watching New Moon ): .

Feel like calling her now LOL .

Okay . I'm going to wrap my school books ltr .

Wish me good luck , cause my wrapping skill isn't that good . LOL .

Bored bored bored boredddd .

Oh ya ,

I kicked Junwei to India alr ^^v.

He's currently MIA-ing cause he ain't replying my messageeeeeeeee .

Bored bored bored boredddddddddddddddddddddddd .

I'm seriously gonna bored dai .

Have been crapping with Melinda daughter , Jasmine baby & etcetc .

But somehow i'm still so sad ): .

Anyway , this morning Shien laopo told me the details about FT Island ,

Coming in Singapore next year

Here are the details :

FT Island’s Singapore 2010 Fanmeet + Fansign
FANSIGN
Day/Date: Friday, 29 January 2010
Time: (To be confirmed soon)
Venue: IMM Garden Plaza (MAP)
Fansign Event Flow: FT Island will only sign Official Fanmeet CDs (only 300 are available), and every fan’s official CD will get signature from only ONE random FT Island member (i.e. the next available “slot” style).
Only fans who are holding the 300 Official Fanmeet CDs, will be admitted into the queue for the fansigning.

FANMEET & HANDSHAKE
Day/Date: Saturday, 30 January 2010
Time: 3pm
Venue: Dragonfly @ St. James Powerstation (MAP)
Fanmeet & Handshake Event Flow: Fanmeet Event will be followed by Handshake Event, where every fan holding a Fanmeet ticket, will get a handshake from ONE random FT Island member only (similar to Fansign style).
The fanmeet event will be a free-standing event.

TICKET PRICING
Event is open for public, but there are limited numbers of tickets sold.

PRICE CATEGORY 1 – S$150 (Total Tickets for Sale = 300)
Inclusive of:
- 1 (One) Ticket to Fansign @ IMM Garden Plaza
- 1 (One) Official Fanmeet CD for Fansign @ IMM Garden Plaza
- 1 (One) Ticket to Fanmeet & Handshake @ Dragonfly

PRICE CATEGORY 2 – S$100 (Total Tickets for Sale = 400)
Inclusive of:
- 1 (One) Ticket to Fanmeet & Handshake @ Dragonfly

LOCAL TICKETS SALES (All categories)
Tickets sale will be open for public, with the following details:

Day/Date: Saturday, 19 December 2009
Time: 1pm – 7pm
Venue: IMM Building (MAP) Exact location within IMM, to be updated soon
Note: There will only be limited number of tickets for sale.
There will only be 300 tickets for sale for Category 1 (S$150), and
400 tickets for sale for Category 2 (S$100) up for grabs. Once these tickets are sold out, there are NO additional tickets sold to the event.

EXCLUSIVE POSTER

Will be given for every ticket purchased at IMM on Launch Day on the 19th of December between 1-7pm, while stocks last

OVERSEAS TICKET SALES (All categories)
Reserved tickets for overseas fans:
- 30 (Thirty) CATEGORY 1 Tickets @ S$150 each
- 50 (Fifty) CATEGORY 2 Tickets @ S$100 each

The above reserved tickets are parts of the limited total number of tickets sold (i.e. 300 and 400 in overall). Overseas tickets sales are by first come/pay, first serve basis.
Payment for overseas tickets purchases are ONLY by a secure online payment method, Paypal (plus charges applied). Posters will be given as long as stocks last only, and payment (by paypal) has to be received by 30 December 2009, or your purchase will be cancelled.
For overseas fans who would like to buy, please email ftislandsintix@gmail.com for the details on how to get your tickets.

DCXL korrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr .

You dont do anything silly okay .

If not i fcuk you upside down .

Don't have doesn't mean you lost the whole world kayyy .

You can still find other people derh.

Follow me

2009-12-03T03:54:00.000-08:00

You used to be the reason why i smile .

Hoho, here to post again before i go back to audi (: .

Hmmm , went to cck with mummy today .

Bought new wallet & handphone pouch .

Though she was the one who choose it luhs .

Ogey , i'm so bored now .

I'm stuck at You're beautiful ep 5 ): .

It seems so long & i just cant seem to finish watching it .

Anyway , heard that FT Island is coming to Singapore next year luhs .

Shien laopo says she wanna go .

I wanna go too . LOL .

My Minhwannn ): !

Sighs , nothing more to post luhs :D .

Jasmine baby,

Cheer up can or not ): .

Don't everyday sadsad liddat.

Got thing must tell me mahs ,

I'll be there to be your listening ears derhs .

And give you advise & help you whenever you need help .

Cause i understand you okay ): .

Dont keep everything to youself.

And don't do silly things to yourself.

Dont cry everyday ): .

I dont allow you do silly things luhs .

Cannot be hurt okay.

You're my twin baby + alotalot moremoremoremoremore ley!

Must happy okay?

I'll try my best to help you derhs D: .

iloveyou :B So cheer up nao (: !

( Inserts many hearts )

2009-12-01T23:06:00.000-08:00

Disappointments .

Back to post :D

Just finished doing our own fam blog's skin .

Alot of things happened these few days .

And i'm so unhappy now ( insert many many unhappy face ) .

Problems are adding on day by day & i dont have any solutions for it ): .

Really at lost of what to do .

Jasmine baby told me not to care about what they say or do .

Cause if i never do anything dont be afraid .

But sometimes , fake things say say say can become true de ): .

I dont really have th confident of holding on so many problems ,

Till now not even one have been down ( solved ) .

I know i'm stubborn ): .

But i just cant change you know .

Stupid , i hate my attitude luhs .

Feel like mia-ing everything though i know it'll be just running away from reality.

But i really am so tired of it .

I really feel that he dont even have the basic trust in me .

He said i checked on him , why would i want to do that ?
If he dont even trust me i wonder why are we together .

Shouldn't couples have trust in each other ?
There're alot of things i wanna tell him .

What's our problem , how can we solve it .

But he seems to engross in his problems that i dont really dare to tell .

And so i pretended i've got nothing to tell him .

But sometimes it's really so disappointing that he doesn't even trust me .

I really don't know what to do anymore .

Darling ask me dont run away from reality .

Kor say if quit = lose le .

But really tired of everything.

Feel like leaving everything as th way it's .

Returning to the past , i swear i wont play these games anymore .

Sigh , so regret now .

Had talk(s) with Melinda daughter & Jasmine baby .

But i not sure it will help ): .

Only they understand & trust me now D: .

Of course include Jeremy kor & Clique luhs .

Sighs . Anyone can teach me what to do now ): ?
Elmo , darling , baby , kor , aiai tried to help . But to no valid luhs ): .

the problem isn't solved .

And i know baby understand what the hell i'm talking about luhs .

Shall end here .

May not post often as computer spoiling soon .

2009-11-30T17:40:00.000-08:00

'' I saw your backview from afar ,

You choose to left me alone .

So why come back now . ''

Haiiiiiiiiiiiizx .

Ogey , i'm so bored nao .

My computer spoil again this morning at 9am :D .

I hitted until it work agin , i'm such a genius ^^v .

Joking .

Alright , went buying books with mummy & Regina daugther yesterday ^^v .

She bought uniform too .

Went to 883 to eat after that .

Rushed home to audi.

Wrap my storybooks & some school books .

Honestly ,

Holiday's so bored .

I wish i could fly back to school to study nao ): .

Everyday either on com or rott .

Gonna meet moments ltr -.- .

Why must i go down not he come my block manzxc .

Soo bad ): .

Ask him come my block he fa children temper ): .

This few days keep crying , now my eye hurt damn fcuking much can .

Keep rubbing x.x ..

Bored bored bored .

Elmo & darling cant think of what name we should change ): .

In th end we're there crapping LOL .

So funny canzx .

Tagged heart with Jasmine baby yesterday night .

Found out that can on alot audi at the same time .

Me & her gonna try it today :x !

Shall stop her , byebye .

Cause it was you who turn your back and walked away .

You choose to hurt me , so dont even bother to regret .

I believe leaving you was the right choice .

At least i won't be hurt once more .

The heart seemed to do it somehow

2009-11-29T01:50:00.001-08:00

Sometimes i cry , sometimes i smile .

But the reason for all those reaction ,

Is you .

New blog , new start .

Everything back to square.

I'm at lost now .

What should i do ?
Feeling so cold , so weak.

Numbed , worned out .

So tired of everything in my life .

Giving up everything , won't it be better for all people ?
Why do i always have the feeling that i'm gonna die soon .

I dont know why this feeling keep coming back to me .

Stop telling me i ain't gonna die soon ,

Cause you won't know when .

Despite being young , i'm tired .

Backstabbed , betrayed .

Dont ask me what happened or cheer up ,

Cause that ain't gonna help anything .

I'm tired of ,

Facing nags of parents .

Being used by friends .

Being backstabbed & betrayed by friends .

Faking a smile .

Lousy results .

Not being able to play well in organ .

Not being able to play well in basketball .

I'm practically tired of everything in my life .

Why are all these happening on me .

Maybe i should just disappear .

Into the thin air ,

And let all misery end here .

I've a lonely feeling ,

And no matter how many times i tried to get that feeling away ,

It always come back no matter what .

I'd cry to sleep every night .

And think about how i could end all this .

Yeah , think doesn't mean i'm able to figure it out .

Cause i'm still confused & lost now .

I blame myself for being so useless in everything .

Call me a fool or a bytch , whatever .

I'm tired of explaining & explaining when it ain't gonna help anything .

I understand that life have ups & downs .

And human(s) have to be positive in almost everything .

But i can't do it anymore .

I've been positive for almost everything ,

When i know it ain't that easy .

People tell me stop being so negative .

Well , you'll never know how i feel & whatthefcuk i'm thinking .

Afterall , i'm nothing but a toy .

I deserve no one but loneliness .

I should be lonely but not happy .

If time could rewind ,

I wish-ed i had never enter gaming life .

Never play-ed auditionsea nor maplesea .

Friends say playing these games would destress .

But they're wrong i guess ,

Playing these games make me more stressed out .

Even more than studies .

How can i cope with these when i can't even cope with my studies .

These games are so addictive, just like a drug .

I knew many people through these games ,

From singapore to malaysia ,

From north , south , to east & west .

But what do i gain ?
Experiences of being hurt & betrayed .

Promises , are still meant to be broken .

I was too naive to believe people'd really keep their promises .

No matter how much you trust that person ,

Your trust , your hope , your effort will still be destroyed by them.

These games taught me alot somehow ,

Gaining experience,

Having gans & friends .

I'm glad i still have some trustworthy gans ,

Gans who have been with me for 1 year & more .

Trying to cheer me up whenever i'm sad .

They're the one(s) who made me stayed again & again .

Yet now , maybe i've to disappoint them again , by leaving .

Who am i ?
I'm Melissa .

My existance itself ,

Is a mistake to everyone .

Everyone who's close with me gets hurt often .

I'm just a curse who brings unhappiness to anyone who's close .

Some people say ,

Continue walking , looking forward .

Yes i'm looking forward .

But my future is just dark , black , and blank .

Nothing more .

I've got no future . I cant see anything .

Some things , are better to be left unsaid .

Some stories , are better to be left untold .

That's how people move on , deciving themselves .

And i was one of them .

I didn't care how much i was hurt in those relationship(s) .

Just blindly move on & act as if i had forgotten everything .

The sweet moments , the sad moments , th moment we broke .

Every relationship will break somedays .

Even married couples .

Everyone'll always be alone in th end .

So why not just be alone now , & forever .

Isn't it better for everyone ?

No hurt , no sadness , no jealousy , no everything .

So why not ?

I'm just a normal girl .

I think how normal girl think .

I'm that ordinary .

That kind of girls that you can find in almost every street .

But why ,

Do you luv me ?
I've got nothing from the start ,

And in the end i'll still have nothing .

Being with me will only harm & hurt you even more .

Why did you stop me from leaving when you're leaving youself ?
And why do you tell me you luv me deeply in a minute ,

And tell me you can't forget some things in another minute ?

You got me so confused , & thinking so far , so much .

Why can't you be true to me , telling me what really happened ?
Ain't couple(s) suppose to trust each other ,

But not keeping any secrets ?
You can say , i'm stupid . To luv you .

But do luv have any reasons ?
You told me you'd nvr break your promise anymore that night .

And you told me you'd never leave me anymore .

But why are you doing all this now ?
Why are all these emptied promises ?

Cause you're my good friend ,

Doesn't mean that give you the right to scold me vulgarities .

So what if we're good friends for 1year & so ?
Does that give you the reason to toy me & scold me ?
I'm a toy , But NOT a toy for YOU .

Hate me so much ?
Just fcukoff from my life then .

Don't expect me to luv you as a friend when you don't even have th,

Basic respect for me .